Saturday, June 18, 2011

African vs African American- The Response

So it seems as thou many of you are taking my post in the wrong way. Firstly I am not saying that African Americans haven't accomplished anything nor am I saying that ALL African Americans behave like ghetto people. I have lived in America for over 12 years I went to elementary, middle and high school in this country and I am well aware of the many achievements that African Americans have accomplished. My post was merely to state the way many Africans view African Americans. When you look at African Americans today versus the African Americans of Dr. Martin Luther King's time, they are a very different group of people. Those people were motivated to change their lives and live better. They also wanted better for their children and went to great lengths to do so. Many African Americans in the 21st century are not as motivated and willing to continue living better and striving for better things. Many have become complacent and have become accustomed to their new way of life and for many of them it involves living of welfare and living in ghettos and working in low end jobs. Again I stress that NOT all African Americans in the 21st century behave this way.
Secondly, I am very well aware that there are lazy people who live in Africa. I am very well aware that there are people in Africa who also live in complacency and refuse to better themselves. I am also very well aware the we, Africans, have many shortcomings. I do not dispute any of it, the violence, corruption, etc... However, that is NOT the issue that I am addressing.  Someone mentioned how Africans only send our "best" to America and another mentioned how only the rich and wealthy bring their kids to the States. As a person who has lived in Ghana and America, I can tell you that it is not entirely true. The wealthy people have it easier because they have the money and connections to get their children here faster. There are many other middle to low class people who have brought their children to America. If you researched you would know that the reason many Africans aren't flocking to America is because of Visas. Obtaining a visa to America is a long and tedious process if you don't have connections. Merely getting an interview to see if you have a chance to get the visa could take months and when you finally get the interview you could easily be denied for any reason, be it valid or not. As an American you should know how Homeland Security and US Customs are strict about foreigners coming here.
Thirdly, the way Africans judge African Americans is the same way African Americans judge Africans. I can not tell you how many times an AFRICAN AMERICAN (NOT white but black) person has asked me "So Do you guys walk around naked or live in mud huts?" and "Do you hunt lions and ride elephants?" Yes, these questions show how ignorant these people are, but it is because of what they have seen on television. If they actually took a trip to Africa the would see that we live in houses and drive cars and socialize just like they do.  The difference between the perspective of Africans on African Americans and vice versa is the Africans I speak of have LIVED with and around African Americans and that is where the base of their perceptions originate. It's not just what they have seen on television, but what they have experienced first hand.
Like I said in my other post, there are MANY African Americans who live in lovely homes and are Doctors, Lawyers and have respectable jobs. The problem is that the percentage of African Americans who live on welfare, and are comfortable being "ghetto" out shines the percentage of African Americans that are well off.
As I also said in my other post NOT ALL AFRICANS feel this way. There are many Africans who could care less about the behavior and perception of African Americans and how it affects them.
Another important reason I forgot to mention in my other post is that the way African Americans behave is a DIRECT reflection on us Africans. Because we are all dark skinned, many (NOT ALL) white people view us in the same light. Like the saying goes "one bad apple can spoil the whole bunch". The "bad" behavior of Africans Americans relates directly to Africans. If an African and an African American both go for an interview, the interviewer can not tell who is African and who is African American unless they speak or specify that they are African or the latter. Therefore they both receive the same preconceived notions or stereotypes which have been formulated against African Americans.  This is one of the reasons why Africans lack respect. Africans are already at the bottom of the list in America. It is only recently that we are acknowledged in a good light and that is not even a really significant effort. As a bottom dweller, we already have a hard enough time trying to reach the top without having bad stereotypes of African Americans added on to the list. This is the reason why many African parents don't want their children hanging out with African Americans.
This perception may be wrong or ignorant or narrow minded but it is FACT. That is how many Africans see it.

Tuesday, June 14, 2011

African vs. African American

My friend an I were having a discussion about the differences between Africans and African Americans. Now at a certain point in the conversation I made the comment that many Africans have very little respect for African Americans. My friend is African American and she was a bit offended and didn't understand why I say that and she had heard it from her other African friends as well and she just didn't get it.  Over the years many Africans have passed through America and lived with and around many African Americans. It's not that we don't have respect for ALL African Americans, it's just the majority of African Americans. One of the main reasons (in my opinion and that of my parents) is the behavior exhibited by a majority of African Americans. Many of them have authority issues, which means they don't like anyone telling them what to do and how to act, especially adults and people in positions of authority. This to many Africans shows a lack of respect for elders and adults and that is something that is an important value in African cultures, which is respecting your elders and adults. Another reason is the way some African Americans speak and carry themselves. They are viewed to behave without class or manners and speak in an uneducated manner. As a Ghanaian, my country has adopted the British way of etiquette and I am expected to behave like a lady and speak "proper" english and carry myself in way that would impress the Queen of England herself.  Another main reason is the environment in which many African Americans live in and the way they live there. People who live in ghettos, sell drugs, wear baggy clothes, join gangs, get pregnant in high school, many don't go to college, many don't even finish high school and very few make something of themselves.
Africans always want what is best for themselves and their children. They work hard and strive to make a better life for their families and to give their children the opportunities they didn't have so that they can become better people. The behaviors of African Americans are the things Africans have seen on tv and experienced first hand and heard through friends or family members. It is a fate that they would give their own lives to avoid their children meeting. Because they don't see any positivity coming from the reasons I mentioned above, they strongly advise their children to keep away from having African American friends.
We all know that not all African Americans behave in those ways. We realize that there are a number of successful, respectful, classy African Americans, who have achieved many great accomplishments. The problem is that, the number of these people is very small and the presence of African Americans who can not and/or will not achieve something better for themselves over shadows the ones who have.
Many of us Africans don't have respect because from our perspective, the majority of African Americans haven't accomplished anything positive and by the way they see it, that is not going to change any time soon. And sadly to say, that is the way it looks.
DISCLAIMER: Not all Africans may feel this way. This is based on what i have heard from many African parents and their children as well as various members of my own family and my own experiences.

Monday, March 21, 2011

The Imperfections

I have a thing for imperfections...
I love the way your eyes are placed on your face.
I love the way your teeth sit in your mouth.
I love the freckles on your face.
I love the way you scrunch your nose when you smile.
I love how big your ears are and how they frame your face.
I love the gap between your front teeth.
I love how smooth and dark your skin is.
See I have a thing for imperfections...
Things that make you unique and special.
Things that set you apart from everyone in your family and your friends.
Things that make you who you are and define your physical personality.
The imperfections that you crave so much to change are what attracts me to you,
Your crocked smile, your kinky hair, your full lips.
Braces, skin bleach and perms only destroy the beautiful imperfections that God has given you.
Plastic surgery, botox, and expensive beauty treatments only take you away from yourself
You loose yourself in an attempt to seek "perfection"
But you see I have a thing for imperfections
Because Your imperfection is My perfection
Your crocked smile is what keeps me going
Your dark, smooth sking is what I crave at night
Your full lips are what I desire every time we kiss
So now you know my thing for imperfections
Relax and let me enjoy your im-Perfection.