There are many things that I will never understand about men and their behavior. I know that men grow up and different environments and have different experiences that shape their behavior. As a result I know that not all men behave in the same manner. This particular blog is directed to the few men who have "difficulties" in relationships; the men who allow the bad things in their past to shape how they express themselves towards women. In my short years of living, I have learned a lot about how men act towards certain things and how their behavior is "in general".I accredit this to my experiences and the experiences of my older friends. One thing I don't understand is why would you allow your past experiences make you cold and make you build up barriers around your heart and feelings especially towards a woman who had opened herself to you and humbled herself down to show you that you can trust her? Why would u continue to hold back? In a past relationship I encountered a young man whose reactions to certain things, in my opinion, were not "normal". When I asked him to stop a behavior that was hindering our relationship and plainly was either annoying or disrespectful to me he would say well "That's just how I am and I'm not gonna change." And when I would ask if he was put in the same situation would it not bother him, his response was "Nope. It wouldn't." I don't think that is a "normal" response because someone who had "normal" reactions would care about how the problem was affecting me and at least try to change or offer a better solution than just stopping completely. If it was truly upsetting to me, he should be willing to stop completely because that is how a relationship works. It's give-and-take. I compromise and change some things and you do the same. That is how people in a relationship grow and flourish and find deep, true love....
If you know that you have no intention on being in a committed relationship with a young woman, why would u string her along and then tell her u need a "break" and offer that you never really wanted a girlfriend in the first place? That is a situation that frustrates me to the core of my being. I believe I can speak for all women when I say, Make your intentions known at the beginning of the relationship. If you know you don't want anything serious, let her know that. If you are interested in something serious but you get scared somewhere along the way, TELL HER!!! Don't leave her hanging and just break it off with some lame excuse because you are afraid. We, women, are all about emotions and feelings and the expression of such things whether we admit to it or not. We like to know what is going on in your heart and head. We also like to know that we are both on the same page as far as the relationship goes....
Speaking of a "BREAK". What in the world is a BREAK? In my opinion, a break is ONLY reserved for couples that have gone through it all. Couples who are in the worst part of their relationships and it seems like a break is the only possible answer. All other relationships don't need breaks. If your relationship is going well and you're both getting along, you don not need a break if you decide to get serious. You can take it slowly and have a conversation about both party's feelings. I PROMISE you that taking a break will NEVER show you if you miss someone. It will only tear you apart because if you didn't know, there is always someone out there looking to take your woman. Another man is watching you and hoping you will make a mistake to make room for him to step in....
That brings me to another point. Like I said, men, there is always another man looking for you to mess up. If you have a woman who is trying as hard as she can to be good to you, cooking; cleaning; changing little things about themselves for you, and you treat her with cold emotions and do whatever you want hoping she will just take it as "just men behaving like men", another man will come along and treat her the way you are not and say the things you should be saying to her. Moreover, her friends will talk things in her ear and encourage her to leave you for this "other" man. You know how some friends are. If they don't like you from the beginning they will jump at the chance to get rid of you when the opportunity comes.
This is just a few of the many things that I see wrong in relationships. I am NOT saying that women are not also part of the issue. This blog is just talking about some points from a woman's perspective.
uhmm uhmm, true true and true, and you write so well and so honestly. i wanna crtiticize some of your points about honesty, commitment and communication. See us men, when we love a woman, we tend to live in the moment with them, where we forget about the past, and careless about the future, we jump in first, support them and love them to the fullest. so when women realize that we love them too much, they take advantage of us, they start to play games on us, they climb on a top like a cat on the tree and make us chase them for as long as we can, until we lead ourselves to self destruction.
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